Writer: John Hibey and Cutter Hodierne
Director: Cutter Hodierne
Cheat your friends and take their money. “That’s peak fucking capitalism,” says Charlie Hegel, the unredeemable villain of the Cutter Hodierne’s cautionary film. Charlie (Josh Brener with a creepily robotic voice) sees that capitalism is a culture which the main protagonist Billy longs to inhabit, but he’s being brought down by his accomplices and their “socialist woowoowawa.”
Cold Wallet begins as a story of brave , resourceful and woefully inexperienced people, victims of a crypto money scam, who set out to get their money back. They team up, drive to their swindler’s hideout, and confront him. Out of their depth in every way, they learn that it is much harder to extract your money than to deposit it, and a modern heist depends not only on digital expertise but also on getting your hands on the passcodes . Charlie does not give up easily. In the course of a stressful night there are arguments, fears of betrayal and a couple of violent deaths.
It’s a film that defies categorisation, but not so much intriguingly as puzzlingly. It starts out as a comedy with some similar plot points to Josh Margolin’s Thelma, including the acquisition of a firearm. In this case there is an enjoyable scene in a gun store, where the team, best described as trepid, are attended by a fresh-faced, up-beat, cheerleader type, played with relish by Lizzy Declement, who asks enthusiastically “How can I get you started?” and is gracious when they go for the boring common-sense gun “whatever the cops use.” Tony Cavalero’s new-agey Dom provides a lot of the humour, reminding everyone to be in touch with their spirituality. On a tense drive through the snowbound Berkshires he remembers performing a Japanese ritual at a nearby waterfall. He uses quiet words to persuade Charlie to hand over the secrets, while gently holding a hammer against his head. Melonie Diaz plays Eva, the only tough one in the group, who gets lines Shakespeare would have written for Lady Macbeth, if only he’d had access to modern vocabulary.
Behind the comedy is the plight of Billy (Raul Castillo) . He is an Everyman figure, the image none of us wants to admit we see in the mirror. He’s an unlucky man with a pitiful lack of survival skills. We first see him against a golden background – Christmas decoration in the bar where he’s boasting about his crypto success. He bubbles away about Reddit forums and podcasts – clearly signalling that he has no idea what he’s talking about. We watch him present his daughter with ridiculously extravagant gift, obviously a self-esteem boost for himself, infuriating his ex who just wants the mortgage paid. He flashes his phone at her just as his investment fails and his “make believe bit gold” turns to a big red debt. Later, as the film becomes a less amusing psychodrama, Charlie is able to play on Billy’s insecurity and untrained judgement. In a panic, he does something life-changingly terrible .
The last third of the film is a thriller-ish chase through Charlie’s distractingly odd mansion. It seems to be a hideout rather than his home , but it’s decorated with reproduction prints that don’t look like your typical crypto bro taste. It does have -which seems more in keeping – various animal heads and skulls fixed to the walls. These provide a visual connection with Billy’s former home (now inhabited by his wife and daughter) where there is a painting of a skull with sunflowers coming out of it. The sense may be that in Billy’s world you have to make do with representations of things rather than things themselves. And this applies especially to wealth.
Cold Wallet is on UK and Ireland digital platforms from 3 March.
