In Search Of Myself – London Improv Theatre

Writer & Director: Benedetta Basile
Reviewer: Christie-Luke Jones

In Search of Myself is an intense, stripped-down, up-close-and-personal look at the impact of bipolar on a young couple’s relationship.

The set is bare bones – a small stage, muted lighting, an occasional chair. The audience is sat around white clothed tables adorned with candles and playing card table numbers. It gives off a very speakeasy vibe as if a vaudeville act might soon grace the stage. So, it’s suitably jarring when Jim and Eve, played by Nathaniel Fairnington and Jo Hartland, launch headfirst into an intimate discussion about Eve’s suitability as a mother.

Fairnington’s Jim is a believably louche foil to Eve’s 1000-words-a-minute onslaught of hyperactivity. Their opening exchanges play out like the setup to every romantic TV sitcom you’ve ever seen – Eve freaks out about something, Jim casually laughs it off while simultaneously complimenting Eve, Eve’s mind darts to the next piece of business. And so on. It’s necessary exposition for what’s to come but falls slightly short of the sweet, funny introductory exchange that it seeks to be. Their interaction is just a little too generic, Fairnington perhaps a little too obvious with his laid-back, everyman shtick.

However, as Eve and Jim begin grappling with the former’s condition, their onstage dynamic becomes instantly more believable and eminently more watchable. Fairnington and Hartland take turns stepping into the offstage shadows to act as doctor/psychologist for Jim and Eve. Hartland excels as a jumpy, suspicious Eve, squirming uncomfortably throughout her interrogation. Hartland leaves no stone unturned in her portrayal, skilfully mutating her prosody to further foreground her character’s fractious mental state.

One small criticism of the writing is that the questions asked by Fairnington and Hartland’s doctor personas seem rather ‘Hollywood’ at times. There are perhaps a few too many ‘But…what is normal?’ moments for them to truly achieve believability as real-life healthcare professionals. But this minor shortcoming fails to overshadow the impressive portrayals of both Eve and Jim, with Fairnington, in particular, growing in both confidence and competence as the play rattles through at the breakneck speed of a real-time panic attack. When asked about his suitability as a carer for Eve, Fairnington morphs into a vulnerable and defensive figure, no longer able to hide the emotional damage he has endured while witnessing his partner’s heartbreaking metamorphosis. It’s incredibly moving, and poignantly emphasises the far-reaching destructive power of mental health disorders.

The audience is likewise made to feel uncomfortable throughout as if genuinely intruding on what is an incredibly fraught and personal battle. This is cleverly revisited later in the play when Eve’s paranoia momentarily reaches beyond the fourth wall to reference the unsettling gaze of a particular audience member. A skilful touch that drags Eve’s struggle out into the real world of the theatre space.

In Search of Myself is a lean, powerful piece of theatre that wastes no time in drilling down to the uncomfortable core of its theme. Its principal characters are portrayed with skill and sensitivity, and writer Benedetta Basile has clearly taken a great deal of care in diligently crafting her play to succinctly and realistically present the effects of bipolar both on those directly affected and their loved ones. An incredibly important piece.

Runs until 1 October 2017 | Image: Contributed